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The Coffee Run: Will It Staple?

October 28, 2010

Coffee Run header

The modern office stapler is a wolf in sheep’s clothing. It is a violent steel machine of piercing authority dressed in well-mannered plastic.

The stapler lives a solitary existence, grazing upon desks or drawers, too functionally unique to dwell among pencils, pens or sticky notes. Hunched in a wide and powerful stance, a metal snarl hovers precipitously over its base, striking fear into any object that challenges its gleaming straits.

Primitive staplers = TOTALLY RIDIC

Today, we honor this unsung business hero with the advent of a new weekly Facebook poll: “Will It Staple?'

The premise is simple. Each Thursday, we’ll show you a picture of an item commonly found around the office (via our Facebook page), and ask you if you think it can be affixed via staple to The Very Important Eight-Page Report. Comment on the image and, if you choose correctly, you’ll be entered into a random drawing to win an T-shirt. A video demonstration will be posted shortly after, answering the question – did it staple?

The contender for Halloween week: A Kit-Kat bar.


Approx. thickness: 0.4'

Composition: Sugar,wheat flour,cocoa butter, nonfat milk, chocolate, refined palm kernel oil, lactose (milk), milk fat

Biodegradable: Yes

Status: Room temperature

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